Codependency: psychological help for the relatives of someone with an addiction
When a loved one uses alcohol, drugs, or other psychoactive substances, the whole family gradually begins to organize its life around their condition, promises, relapses, and attempts to control what's happening.
Psychological support for a relative isn't only about understanding how to act around the person with an addiction. It also helps restore your own boundaries, reduce constant emotional strain, and build a more stable way of coping.
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When your whole life starts to revolve around a loved one's behavior
It's worth booking a consultation if you notice that you:
What codependency is
In clinical practice, the term "codependency" describes a stable pattern of relating in which a person's life becomes excessively centered on another person's problems, condition, and behavior.
This doesn't mean that caring about a loved one is wrong. The problem arises when that care gradually turns into constant control, rescuing, self-neglect, and life lived in chronic emotional tension.
The goal of a consultation isn't to label someone "codependent," but to understand exactly which patterns of interaction have formed in the family and what the relative themselves can change.
"How do I make them stop drinking?"
This is one of the most common questions relatives ask. But an adult cannot be reliably forced to change their behavior through conversation, control, or pressure alone.
Psychological work with a relative focuses on what is actually within their own control: their decisions, boundaries, ways of communicating, responses to relapses, stepping out of destructive patterns, and caring for their own psychological wellbeing.
If the person with the addiction is willing to seek help, a separate path of psychological and, where needed, medical care can be arranged for them.
What we work on in a consultation
Personal boundaries
We identify what you are and aren't willing to accept in the relationship, and how to communicate your decisions consistently.
Control and rescuing
We examine actions that give a brief sense of control but may actually keep the familiar family system running.
Guilt and responsibility
We separate the responsibility of the adult with the addiction from your own responsibility for your decisions and safety.
Fear of relapse
We work with the constant anticipation of the next episode of use and the emotional dependence on your loved one's state.
Communication and strategy
We build a clearer way of talking, without persuading or threatening, and define what to do if the use continues, if your loved one becomes willing to seek help, and in crisis situations.
Reclaiming your own life
We restore attention to your own health, work, relationships, interests, plans, and resources.
If the person with the addiction doesn't want help
A relative can reach out to a psychologist on their own.
You don't need to wait for the person with the addiction to agree to a consultation.
Even if your loved one's behavior isn't changing yet, you can change your own approach: stop taking part in the same destructive patterns, set boundaries, prepare for difficult conversations, and understand what actually is within your control.
How to talk to someone with an addiction
There's no single phrase guaranteed to make someone stop using. But a conversation can still be made more constructive.
What relatives should avoid doing
When urgent medical or emergency help is needed
A psychological consultation does not replace emergency or medical care.
If the person shows loss of consciousness, seizures, marked deterioration of their physical condition, psychotic symptoms, threats to harm themselves or others, suicidal statements, or other acute symptoms, seek medical or emergency help right away.
If you've been living with this for years
Living alongside someone with an addiction for a long time rarely leaves a person untouched — so the work here isn't only about the relationship with them.
Where you are now
Chronic stress, anxiety, emotional exhaustion, disrupted sleep, lost sight of your own goals, and the feeling that your entire life is subordinate to someone else's problem.
What we work toward
Restoring your own psychological wellbeing, your ability to make decisions, and gradually taking back control of your own life.
Natalia Zentsova
Doctor of Psychological Sciences · Medical Psychologist · Professor
Over 20 years of professional practice. I work with addiction and codependency, complex cases, and crisis states — situations where a family has long struggled to know how to help without destroying their own life in the process.
I offer second opinions and, where needed, personal support for patients and their families — building an individual care plan and coordinating with specialists across different fields.
More about me →Frequently asked questions
You can reach out for help even if your loved one isn't ready yet
You don't have to wait for the person with the addiction to acknowledge the problem or agree to see a specialist. You can start making changes from your own side of the situation.
In an individual consultation, we'll go through what's happening, your habitual patterns of behavior, your boundaries, and possible next steps.
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